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| 'I practiced this 'caring' look a lot in the mirror.'
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Ahh, the perks that come with being the resident news geek for a TV network. Rides on the President's private jet (your tax dollars hard at work), private hairdressers (Brokaw is one of the best-groomed anchors in the business), and a traveling harem of middle-eastern belly dancers (we made that up)? It certainly makes up for the grueling hours Brokaw has spent delivering watered down blabber to his loyal television viewers.
While aboard the Prez's private jet, Brokaw whined enough to get interviews with the Big Cheese himself and some of the president's top national security advisers. Details of those interviews aired on MSNBC and NBC's Nightly News Wednesday. We didn't watch.
After being dumped off at Ramstein Air Force Base in Germany, Brokaw
planned to conquer Albania with a dull Swiss army knife and a can of beans, but at the last minute decided instead to meet with Kosovan refugees, humanitarian workers, and military personnel. Brokaw probably spent some quality time working on his appalled/sorrowful expression when preparing for the visit.
When asked what the hell took him so long (weren't CBS's Dan Rather and ABC's Ted Koppel there, like, a month ago?) Brokaw said that NBC was only recently granted access. "I would have gone earlier if I had that kind of special access," he said. Special access? How come those tools, Rather and Koppel, got special access? Brokaw had no comment regarding the "special access denial," but was probably thinking "I got your special access right here, pretty boys."
Brokaw questioned Clinton on several worn out issues including: Peace initiatives, his credibility, and what it's like for a tree hugging pansy who opposed Vietnam to be slamming Tomahawk missiles down the throats of a bunch of Serbs. We did not see/hear Clinton's answers to these questions, but they were most likely vague and pathetic.
Brokaw did not ask Clinton how his wife's ankles got so fat, as expected.
"He's the commander-in-chief, he's the guy who's effectively running the war," Brokaw said. "We've been trying for some time to get inside the decision-making process and see it, and I think that this is very valuable."
Brokaw also planned to assassinate NATO Supreme Allied Commander General Wesley Clark before coming home (this is such a lie). His weapon of choice was the broken handle of his favorite Barry Manilow coffee mug.
Brokaw changed his mind at the last second, opting to ask several dull questions instead.
