Sunday 9 May 1999
By eBroadcast Staff and agencies.

The New York Daily News has reported a Lewinsky sighting during Thursday dress rehearsals for the barely tolerable skit comedy show Saturday Night Live

Above: Reinforcing the old adage that fat people are funny. Er, jolly.

SNL, in an obvious attempt to give new meaning to the term "beaten to death," will most likely bring the portly intern on stage during a skit Saturday Night.

The NY Daily News gave the scoop on the pathetic story line. Ms. Lewinsky, will barrel into the skit and push aside actress Molly Shannon (probably throwing her for at least two hundred feet), who frequently portrays The Larden One in skits. The News did not indicate whether actor John Goodman would reprise his role as Linda Tripp (God, we hope not).

During rehearsal this week, Ms. Lewinsky was said to make jokes about dating and phone sex with President William Howard Taft. Wow. That's funny. Our sides are splitting right now. (For those of you who don't get the joke, or what little of it there is, Taft was President from 1909-1913).

NBC did not confirm or deny the earth-shattering report. "This is a live show. The only thing I know for sure is that Cuba Gooding Jr. is the host and Ricky Martin is the musical guest," said NBC spokesperson Marc Liepis, in typical network weasel speak.

Instead of making jokes about Lewinsky's hair, fat neck, huge ass, bloated lips, or out of control eating habits, we'd like to simply wish her good luck, in the hopes that her performance is stellar (oh, and we hope her panty lines don't show too much).

Hey Monica - you go, girl!